Last Minute Gifts That Will ROCK Your Christmas! By Karen McGovern

Christmas is, like, a month away....right?

  

Ah, the joy of realizing the week before Christmas that you still have 25 gifts to magically make appear.  If you are like me, you wait until that golden moment of panic/procrastination hits and you rush to your laptop and order everyone you forgot about something "thoughtful" from Wallgreens like socks with toes in them, or whatever else is left for sale on Amazon in the hours before Christmas.  DON'T BE THIS PERSON!

Even if you find yourself scrambling for last-minute gifts, there is no need to panic or end up buying crap you then have to GIFT WRAP like it's something actually NICE.  No one wants to open a nicely wrapped gift to find A JAR OF PICKLES.  Unless that's your thing...then, YEAH?

So, I am here to give you some super-cool, EASY, and INEXPENSIVE ideas for gifts that will make you KING/QUEEN OF THE HOLIDAY PARTY.  Your welcome....

1.  The hilarious gag gift.  Anything from Archie McPhee.  How can you resist a website who's tag line is: "Archie McPhee has the best toys, gifts, candy and novelties on the internet. We love the same things you do: unicorns, bacon, mustaches and underpants." My favorite item this year is the Centaur Santa Claus. Cause...SANTA HAS AN AMAZING SIX-PACK!  So, for those on your list with a slightly twisted sense of humor, get them HANDERPANTS and move on.

2. For the person who loves technology.  BOOMFS.  What are Boomfs, you ask?  Only MARSHMALLOWS PRINTED WITH IMAGES YOU UPLOAD TO THE SITE! Serioulsy!  How cool is this?  I bought everyone Boommfs last year and got rave reviews.  This is especially wonderful for Grandparents--imagine how they will love getting a box of marshmallows all with the Grandkids faces on them!!!  Then plopping those adorable faces into a piping hot cup of cocoa and watching them melt....wait, that escalated rather quickly...Anyway, it's a fun, inexpensive gift to give that is easily personalized.  But hurry, they stop shipping SOON.

3. The gift that will make you look far more interesting than you probably are.....AN EXPERIENCE.  What do I mean?  Well, how about giving a gift that actually requires the recipient to DO SOMETHING?  Tickets or passes to a local museum/nature center/science museum/art show/concert/performance.  NOT MOVIE TICKETS, but tickets to an actual event or activity.  AND, throw in a disposable camera so they can share the experience after.  My local nature center offers open ended day passes, and I buy these all the time. I am lucky to live in Florida and can give things like passes that allow folks to go on sea turtle nest walks along the beach or visits to wildlife rehab centers. This type thing is a great stocking stuffer and you will be surprised...people sometimes actually LIKE being forced to leave the home....

Just imagine, this could be YOUR FAMILY...OUTSIDE!

4.  For the DIY-ers.  Put ANYTHING into a clear craft glass Christmas ornament from Michael's.  Seriously. ANYTHING placed inside a clear ornament is instantly ADORABLE. Got a friend with dogs?  Tuck a few dog treats into an ornament.  Cats?  CATNIP, DUH. You can put CHEX-MIX in a clear ornament and have a spectacular hostess gift.  Tea lover?  Cram a few Earl Gray bags inside.  Dried flowers, mini candy canes, lottery tickets, CASH, JEWELRY, it can all be stuffed into these ornaments and you are a HOLIDAY SUPERHERO.  How about wildflower seeds?  Heck, any seed at all!  Perfect for a gardener....A LOVE LETTER!  Photographs!  If I wasn't late and trying to get this post up, I bet I could sit here and think of 12 BILLION things you could tuck into one of these ornaments to create a really thoughtful, cool gift. I am personally making many of these this year.  I would love to tell you what I am putting inside, but I can't because a few of the folks getting this read this blog and well....I want it to be a surprise!

5.  Finally, if you want to totally ROCK Christmas, buy some hand-made, amazing artisan jewelry and more from any of the spectacularly talented artists right here on LMAJ.  Most of us also offer gift certificates, so you don't even have to suffer through looking at all the amazing jewelry and art and trying to decide what to buy.  No one, I mean NO ONE will be less than THRILLED with this gift.  And, I don't have to tell you that you are also giving a gift to the artists you support...your purchase allows us to continue doing what we love, and helps us with other stuff--like supporting our families and such....

So, take a deep breath, all you Secret Santas, you can do this!  I hope your holidays are bright and full of love and peace.  From all of us here at LMAJ....HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!

Taking Time to Care...ABOUT YOURSELF! By Karen McGovern

It's madness out there.  I mean, seriously.  Holiday fever has hit with the efficiency of a targeted missile strike--which, according to my TV and newspaper, is pretty darned spot-on.  I will not take a bunch of time here to tell you what you already know.  We are all under intense pressure as artists right now to create for our clients, for our shops, for our family and friends--all while somehow balancing annoying things like EATING and CLEANING THE HOUSE.  And, those people we live with, constantly expecting us to ACTUALLY HAVE TIME FOR THEM. Talk about juggling chainsaws....

So, as I try to do the 1,000 things I do every day anyway, and try to fulfill orders and commitments artistically, I have decided to add one more thing to the very top of my list.  Take two hours EVERY DAY TO DO NOTHING.  Now, I say take two hours....that is so I can negotiate down if needed but still feel like I have given myself a break.  I go to Starbucks and have a grande iced upside down caramel macchiato with salt an extra shot of expresso.  OMG THAT IS SOOOO GOOD!  And, have you tried the new pastries Starbucks is now carrying?? THE LITTLE PECAN TARTS ARE FROM THE DEVIL.

I read.  I take a nap. I sit in my orchid house.  And, if I am in the studio, I take that time to make something JUST FOR FUN.  Like this ornament.  I don't make ornaments, but this one just sort of happened.  It's a partridge--like from the pear tree thing.  It also sort of looks like a fancy version of the animated birds in the opening of the Partridge Family (GOD I AM OLD).  If you are looking for a quickie hostess gift to make, a simple brass or copper spiral (14 or 16 gauge wire), soldered to itself at the end and hammered makes a lovely ornament. Color with patina or metal paints, add a ribbon or raffia string (please do not use a crappy wire hook like I did), hang from a wine bottle and you have a great gift! 

I have taken to throwing myself (and my husband if he is not frantically working) a happy hour every day from 4:00 to 5:00 pm.  We sit with an orphaned bongo antelope we hand reared who needs the company until she is ready to be introduced to the herd.  She will be one year old this Thanksgiving and yes, I will be throwing a birthday party for her.

Hello, My name is Delilah and I am the cutest thing on EARTH.

I work seven days a week from dawn until dark.  Seriously.  That's what it takes when working with captive wildlife.  I could throw a joke in here about how anyone with kids understands working with captive wildlife--AMIRIGHT???  And, all the cliche things we read about how we are no good to anyone if we are not good to ourselves may be trite, but are also true.  Especially this time of year when we are in creative overdrive on top of everything else.

Bottom line, taking time for yourself to do nothing is not only okay--IT IS NECESSARY.  AND, if anyone dares to try to make you feel guilty for doing so, they deserve to be punched in the throat.  Or ignored.  For two whole hours.

Now, not everyone can take two hours every day.  So that's where the negotiating comes in.  Take an hour.  Break it up--15 minute here, 20 minutes there, whatever.  Pop a clean, dry dishtowel in the microwave for 15 seconds, spritz it with lavender and mint essential oil, plop it on your face and lay down for 10 minutes.  YOU WILL EMERGE A PRINCESS OF GOOD MENTAL HEALTH.

Also, the day after Thanksgiving, make a pitcher of coquito and label it something hideous so no one will drink it but you.  "Mom's diarrhea medicine" will work nicely.  Then, give yourself a huge glass sip every damned day till it's gone.  Try not to drink it all at once.  It will be difficult, as this is a coconutty dream of a beverage created by angels and delivered to mortals via unicorns raised by ancient Puerto Rican Shamans, passed down through the ages by the grace of all things alcoholic and wonderful.  If you don't want the booze, skip it, and add some rum extract instead.  You can thank me later.  Why wait till after Thanksgiving you ask?  WERE YOU RAISED BY WOLVES? Coquito is traditionally a Christmas beverage, so anytime after Turkey Day is wide open. 

Whatever you can come up with to give yourself a boost, a mental break, a pick-me-up--DO IT, and do it as often as you can.

Finally, I made earrings.  That's sort of a big deal for me, because I would rather chew my own arm off than make earrings.  BUT, I wanted to prove to myself that I could and I DID IT! As of this post I have created 30 PAIRS OF EARRINGS!!  Also, I like displaying them on a big wine glass....might do this for the holiday gift show I am in this coming Sunday.  Wish me luck!  

For those of you participating in holiday shows, I wish you crowds of appreciative shoppers scooping up your wonderful works.  I wish all of you a happy and peaceful season.  Enjoy yourselves, and make something BEAUTIFUL!

In closing, I leave you with this from Archie McPhee. Because EVERYONE needs a Santaur this holiday season.

Art Up To Your Eyeballs - by Karen McGovern

Well, how was your Thanksgiving?  Are you still wearing your elastic waist fleece pants?  Are you stuck to the couch?  Have you managed to get the gravy stains out of...well....everything?  I hope you all had a peaceful, joyful, delicious, self-indulgent Thanksgiving with family and friends.  I know I did! 

 

Now, on to the important stuff.  WHAT ARE YOU BUYING FOR CHRISTMAS GIFTS?  Not....I hope you'll give yourself a breather before diving into the next holiday.  Yesterday was Black Friday, and I stayed home, just like I do every year.  I'm still working on the turducken, and will be well into the first quarter of 2014. AND, I had some family to care for...

An orphaned grey squirrel...

An orphaned bongo antelope newborn.

Ninita, a baby pygmy marmoset.

Among about a thousand other critters that need my attention. 

Black Friday and Cyber Monday (day after tomorrow) are burned into our brains via the Gods of Advertising.  Yes, you can get some good deals a few things you might actually want, and end up with a TON OF GARBAGE YOU DON'T.  Here's my take....

 

If you follow this blog, you know that there are thousands of incredibly talented artists and independent vendors sweating it out to make a living, hoping like HELL they will be noticed in the coming days and weeks leading up to Christmas.  You've been asked and pleaded with to shop small and local.  What you actually do is up to you.  I'm not going to try to shame you into forgoing the mall--its pull is almost hypnotic.  SO MANY SPARKLY LIGHTS.  So, I'm just going to ask you to look to the right and left of this post for links to artists and vendors I hope you will at least consider clicking on and taking a look at.  One of them is me.
 

 I am not holding a sale right now.  I just had one to celebrate the launch of my own independent website with my very own online shop.  Not through Etsy, Artfire, BigCartel or anything else.  That's right folks--if you visit my website and make a purchase, you deal directly with ME.  I KNOW--CRAZY, RIGHT???  Well, it is.  And it's also a gamble.  No big storefront that is recognized by millions.  No advertizing other than what I can generate on my own.  No middleman (except for PayPal...can't get around that).  But, let's get back to the first sentence of this paragraph.  I'm not holding a sale right now.  WHAT???  I know, I seem to be Hell-bent on shooting myself in the foot, right?  Well, to be honest, I simply can't afford a sale now.  My desire as a jewelry designer and artist has always been to create AFFORDABLE work.  I donate most of my proceeds to support wildlife conservation.  My goal is to use my work to build a bridge between art and nature, cover my costs, and be able to give a significant portion in support of something I deeply believe in.  So, my work is already priced about as low as I can go and still be able to continue creating it.  Why am I telling you this?  Well, obviously, I hope you'll visit my site and consider making a purchase.  But also, I would like you to consider when you purchase from me or any of the artists you can find here, you have an opportunity you can't get anywhere else.  You actually get to know the artists you buy from.  So many have a really unique, wonderful story to tell.  When you purchase from an independent artist, like those listed here and all over this blog, you have the opportunity to create a personal connection, and I find that so interesting, rare and special!  Artists like us put it all on the table.  If you follow us or connect via our shops and Facebook pages you'll get a glimpse into a REAL LIVE HUMAN LIFE!  How cool is that?  If you go even further and read our blogs and personal posts, you'll get to see Staci build her dream studio, get to cheer as MaryAnn is able to  raise and direct funds from her work to purchase awesome cat condos for a rescue organization, get to read Mary Jane's stunning poems and insights into her jaw-dropping work, and get to hear me go on and on and on about wildlife conservation, among other things. That's just three of the MANY fantastic artists here!  You'll hear about our art shows, our amazing screw ups (sometimes with PICTURES) as well as our triumphs and joys.  WE LIVE THIS STUFF, PEOPLE!
 

 

So, what does this have to do with me not holding a sale?  Well, I guess I just wanted you to know that you have many, many more reasons to shop with me and the aritsts you see here beyond the enticement of a sale.  AND, by the way, that sale isn't easy for anyone to offer.  None of the artists here (in my opinion) should have to have a sale, yet they are, becuase this is their LIVLEYHOOD and they need your support, and because we seem to have become a nation that MUST HAVE A SALE AFTER THANKSGIVING ON EVERYTHING IN THE UNIVERSE OR WE WILL DIE.  Or something like that....

 

I know it may not be in my best interests to forgo this weekend in terms of sales, etc.  But, it is in the best interest of my conscience.  So, I'll go with that.

So, show us independent artists some love this season....pretty please!!

Happy Holidays to all, I wish you Peace, Joy, and Prosperity!!